Here's the deal...

grow up a bit, why don't ya?












Seriously, I only know about two 20-somethings that aren't a total mess...

Now, I know better than to consider this a generational thing. I happen to dance with a 20-something who is completely cool. Love her to pieces. She's sage, witty, has a sense of fun, a dark sense of fun. But this other bunch, whoa...

...either they're busy acting like 14 year olds (whoops... act like a child and I'm going to treat you like a child)... Yeah, that shrieking and skipping routine might have been cute out of you were you were 10, but at 20 something? At 20 something you look like a moron and no one there thought you were cute or even slightly amusing. We were embarrassed for you. That collective "we" includes a whole lot of women who know how to embrace their inner child, don't fool yourself otherwise.

...busy taking so many prescription drugs to DEAL with the terrible life they got handed (OH-KAY, so tell me again about how hard it is to have to start working for the first time at 23? I started working at 13, hun. And what a rotten guy your husband is to make you work? Let's see, what part of you met in college should lead me to believe you didn't want a career ever? Can the smallest violin in the world play even less for idiots like you than usual?)

...busy being posers and wannabes. Hullo, when will you develop a sense of self? You claim to work for the same agency I do, but wait... then you're federal... oh, wait, then you're a teacher... oh! Oh! Now you're a sniper?

...oh right, I'm supposed to think that you're either tragic or cute. Guess what, you aren't either. Nor are you a woman, and you sure aren't the talent you think you are. Then we venture into the dangerous world where you like to believe yourself as my equal. You want to turn back, child. You really do. In order to be my equal you will need to know a lot more about life and it's real losses, deaths, abuses, hardships. You will need to know how it feels to have your guts ripped out by a murderer when you sit for 6 weeks in the same room with them. you will need to know about multiple sclerosis and heart disease and hospice and strokes... you will need to know what it feels like to watch brilliant people fall to the darkness that is dementia and never come back to reality.


Nor do I think I'm perfect. But your childishness is an embarassment to some of us who worked hard to pave the way for jackasses like you, not only in the military but in corporate America. I paid my dues, I'm not asking you to pay a thing... just suggesting that it's time to grow up. If you're thinking I'm a bitch now... don't ever actually piss me off, LOL!

My big sister (center), 5/29/54 - 5/24/08

In the time of sleep this body is as though dead;

it does not see nor hear;
it does not feel;

it has no consciousness, no perception—that is to say,

the powers of man have become inactive,

but the spirit lives and subsists.

Nay, its penetration is increased, its flight is higher,

and its intelligence is greater.

To consider that after the death of the body the spirit perishes

is like imagining that a bird in a cage

will be destroyed if the cage is broken,

though the bird has nothing to fear

from the destruction of the cage.

Our body is like the cage, and the spirit is like the bird.

We see that without the cage

this bird flies in the world of sleep;

therefore, if the cage becomes broken,

the bird will continue and exist.

Its feelings will be even more powerful,

its perceptions greater, and its happiness increased.

In truth, from hell it reaches a paradise of delights

because for the thankful birds

there is no paradise greater

than freedom from the cage.

--‘Abdu’l-Bahá

From the sacred Bahá’í Writings

(Some Answered Questions, ch.61)

As luck would have it...

When I decided that my path was the one of Gothic Bellydance, I had to embrace the fact that my venues would be limited. During that journey, however, I saw wonderful women also performing with a modicum of tongue-in-cheek about their art.

Given my love of Ren Faires and the huge opportunity they present for performance, I decided to explore the possibility of bringing a little dark fusion humorously to the faire. I approached a dear friend Ameena (now Chaos of The Three Calamities) and a more recent dance acquaintence Nadeeda (now Strife of the Three Calamities). To my surprise they were thrilled to join in on my dark fun.

18 inch spider and sharp sword in tow, we began to unravel the mystery of making the "Itsy Bitsy Spider" belly dance-able, Ren Faire worthy and... yes... a bit dark. I, myself, dancing as Discord, brought the dry humor, while Chaos totally cracks me up with her zaniness verging on slapstick. I remember her always as THE PERSON who laughed out loud in the middle of belly dance class, I knew in that instant she had to be my friend! We have spent 2 years laughing out loud at ourselves, with the occasional tear mixed in - but over fried chicken and leg injuries have build a solid, life affirming friendship. Strife may be youthful chronologically, but a wittier friend I shall not hope for. She is delightful! While Chaos and I have a few years of history, Strife is a person we've only met through class... but we both pegged her as ONE OF US.

I'm here to report we rocked the Faire. In our own small way, but indeligibly. I was asked repeatedly when/if we were performing again. Our teacher (who is also the studio owner) loved it, encouraged our performance.

There is nothing like watching the crowd GROW as you dance to validate your imagining.

There is nothing like looking, first right, then left, and thinking... "oh my God, I have the best friends to dance with. I love these women!" And then looking straight up (randomly) into your husbands smiling eyes as he snaps what will become a favorite photo for all time.

For Daisy

Dancing at the
Great Plains
Renaissance Festival...

Yup, outdoors!

Yup, staring into the sun (sunglasses are prohibited)!

Yup, that's about a 25 mph wind beneath my veil. Possibly stronger!

Come a little closer

What or who is The Lilim?

A state of mind I suppose... my alter ego when I do dark fusion. A woman who messes with people when they deserve messing with (and yes, I get to decide that, unilaterally)... a daughter of Lilith.

Confidence, passion and the ability to stick your tongue!

As a bellydancer who tries to learn WHY we do some of what we do, I've become enthralled with the Maori. My friend Saahira is a self-described "kiwi" and shares some fascinating facts from the New Zealand perspective. Through her I learned of the Haka... a traditional Maori dance. Now, seriously, this is a dance that involves the ENTIRE body.

It saddens me a bit that so few dancers bother to learn why they apply artificial facial tattoos, or do certain moves, or wear specific bits of apparel. But for now, I'll shut up and sit back and enjoy the Haka!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c-lrE2JcO44

Pixie...

So this small (delightfully so) incredible woman with huge emotional/energy stature takes 122 pictures of me back in February. Last night she blew me away with the final edits.

www.pixievisionproductions.com

I doubt that I'm on there, but her work is well worth a look at!